The -Ist List: Beer worth getting shot at for

We saw this story early this week and couldn't help but comment on it. It turns out some teens were stealing beer, got shot at by a deputy and one got away. Of course, we at Houstonist do not condone stealing beer or underage drinking, and we are certainly anti-shooting at anyone (even lawyers). But if you're going to get shot at for stealing beer anyway, don't get shot at over a 12 pack of Corona. Not worth a bullet in your ass.

As a PSA to kids who are going to illegally try to acquire that most delicious of beverages, we present the -ist list of beers you should steal if you're going to steal beer anyways.

1. Stella Artois: Because they show the commercials for them before independent-type films, you'll be a big hit with the girls. it'll show you've got way more culture than the plebes showing up with hot Keystone Light.

2. St. Arnold's Amber: Show them you're a homeboy who flies the Houston flag.

3. Dos XX: Truly, the better of the two Mexican light beers. Make sure to bring some extra limes.

4. Guinness: You can be that asshole who insists you're hard because you drink Guinness. It's completely unusable on girls over the legal drinking age, so why not wear it out while you still can?

5. Shiner Bock: It looks good, it tastes good and liked by jocks, hicks, hipsters and nerds alike.

6. Harp & cider: A spiderbite! You're in high school, so you probably don't have a great taste for beer anyway. A spoonful of cider helps the medicine go down.

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Photo by Flickr user DPlanet::