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November 29, 2007

Houston's Missed Connections: Amazing Sex

20070314_missed_connections.jpg

Houstonist is pleased to see that the holidays haven't lessened the amount of folks who seem to be "a sandwich short of a full picnic basket."

Still in doubt? Read on.

Amazing Sex .... Why didnt i get your number? - m4w - 28

We made eye contact in the grocery store. You waited for me outside then we had amazing sex in your mini van. It was a blast and i would love to do it again. I am sorry that i was so caught up in the moment that i didnt get your name or number. I hope you read this so we can do it again.

Re: Amazing Sex

Dude, let's be serious here. Does a girl who picks up and has sex with a random guy she sees at a grocery store...in her VAN....in a parking lot really sound like the kind of girl that is looking to give her name and number out?

Honestly. Just congratulate yourself for your "luck" and move on.

Re: Amazing Sex

Umm Yeah I'm sure she's going to get right on that and is looking for something steady. Doesn't say much for someone who will screw a random person in a parking lot.
You're better off just hanging out in the parking lot to see if she's there - possibly showing someone else the inside of her mini-van?

To "Amazing Sex" in Parking Lots - 32


Dear LaPorte,
You are filthy, and disgusting, just like your air quality.

Thank you for solidifying, once again, the desperation, scum, and downright miserable existence that I ran away from so long ago.

Enjoy your bubble of toxins, incest, and rubbish.

-Samantha

(whoever she was, she probably already directly, or indirectly slept with 1/2 of your friends, and you 1/2 of hers. Congrats on your patheticness! That is of course, if you aren't one of the many pathelogical liars that crawls out of the swamps of muck, and fabricates your mediocre existance to actually be interesting.)

Good Riddance, may natural selection take it's course.

Samantha et al., well done. Thanks for making our job easy. We like easy. Um, where did you say that van was parked?

---
Photo: flickr user fd.


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Comments (1)

ok i vote for this as the best missed connections post ever...

 
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