Houstonist Haiku: St. Pat's Day edition

Ah, St. Patrick's Day
Today, everyone's Irish
And — hey! Stop pinching!

But seriously:
I'm wearing green underpants.
No, you can't see them.

At happy hour
Dollar green beer keeps flowing
Barkeep! More for me!

Twelve beers later
Or was it fifteen? More beer
Ought to help me count.

Epilogue: I feel
like I'm the color of the
Chicago River

But I work Tuesday.
Do you think the boss will mind
If I call in sick?

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