Houston's Missed Connections: Marrying Young is Dumb

Houstonist learned a lot this week on Craigslist's Missed Connections. Did you know the following? Gay men with no style aren't supposed to have naughty thoughts about baby daddys, but cliches ain't so bad. Birds of a feather flock together so don't break up. It's too hard to get over. Just hook up with the grocery sacker instead.

your birthday is 5-17-79 - w4m - 22

my exhusband,

i left you four years ago

i was too young to be married

i still love you

i still miss you

i never told you but i'm sorry

your exwife

The results of Houstonist's ten year study on marriage reveals that getting married younger than 25 has disaster written all over it. The disaster factor decreases by 10% for each year beyond the cheap-insurance threshold. There's a reason that "young and dumb" is a saying. Read below for further illustration.

Damn J.M - m4w

We were perfect together and you know it. You listened to too many peple tell you other wise and that was our demise. I do have another life now aND though I am content I am not happy BECAUSE I don't live a day of it without regret of the pain I caused you and then letting you walk out on what we had.

You are one of the most beautiful people I have ever met. You facinated me with so many things. I miss your lips all over me, your fingers always felt new and hungry on me. We were so beautifully matched and I would bring you pleasure all night, hours and hours of it and never want anything in return thats how I know what we had was real. You loved me with all of you and I never appreciated it. I was too young and stupid to see all of the things you sacrificed for me and what all you meant to me. I want to do it again, do all of it over, the fights, the crying, the good times, the trips, the dinners and the best rounds of sex I ever had in my life. For me, It will never get any better then what we had. You were my true match I know it now and it's too late. If ever you need anything, I want to give it to you,let me. plese always know that your old playboy would give it all up for you. I miss you everyday, all of me misses you, I need you.

Life after the Midtown cheese factories ain't so rosy is it? Buck up, camper. Put on your shiny shirt. Back out that Beemer from your rented town home. Drive the two blocks to your Midtown spot and pay to valet. Go inside and order your Ultra before trolling. Repeat until you think the Ultra tastes great and then walk the two blocks home.

Camilia at Front Porch Pub - m4w - 26

hey i know this a super long shot. camilia with the black hair (and goes to cyfair???), please contact me. you were with your friends - your roomy wearing a red top with long curly brown hair, the black, the white and the asian guy. ok..jajajaja, sounds like the start of a bad joke. they were a little over protective which is completely reasonable. We arm wrestled. i thought you were beautiful. you kept complaining that you hurt your arm earlier in the night. You sang for me. I was impressed, but you wanted me to sing for you but I can't sing. You tried to kiss me too many times, but you were a little drunk. I never got your number because your friends interfered. I'd love to take you out sometime.

Dude, you need a wing man. And, we don't care if you speak Spanish or not, laughing is always spelled "hahahaha." It's a fact. You can look it up.

I really wish it would have turned out differently - w4m - 30

There are so many things I want to say to you, but you want to remain friends, so I have to be careful what I say. I am really sorry that I have herpes, and even though it was not my fault, I hate it even more, because it is preventing me from being with you. I can only hope that someday we can work it out, because I believe we are the perfect match for each other. It is what it is, right?

Congrats. You just made our Tuesday Top Ten Things That Suck List. Two words: Valtrex.

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Photo: flickr user fd.