Lots of crazy people in the Missed Connections universe this week. Hotties are paging Dr. McDreamy. Bleeding heart poets pour out their souls while young trouser snakes are cougar stalking in Katy. Chinese cuisine lovers beware. A "BBW" is in the mood for some afternoon delight times two.

On the Job - w4m - 18 (SE Houston)

You came into the place where I work today. You sat in the back for a while. I came over to you and we talked for almost an hour. You never did buy a dance from me. I went to the bathroom, and when I came back, you were gone. I thought we really had a connection. I want to see you again.

Me: white, schoolgirl outfit, black hair, pierced nipples, lots of tattoos

You: white, in your 30's, tall, black slacks, black shirt, lots of tattoos

Please, I hope you see this. I will make it worth your while.

By "I will make it worth your while" do you mean that you'll hook us up with extra bacon on the breakfast buffet?

Ken, Stuart, It Is Hard To Decide - w4m - 35 (Humble)

I am torn between you two. Just need time to think. I have been with so many men, and married ones at that,I have to soul search. I find married men interesting, but the two of you, though single, provide a breath of fresh air. However, public knowledge of involvement with either of you proves risky for my career. Give me time. My career is very important to me.

37? We told you. Hook us up with the extra bacon and you're golden.

Pineapple for crystal dunn - m4w - 26 (Downtown)

Do you ever miss your pineapple?

Yeah, but not as much as her melons our melon.

Who are you??? - m4w (Tatooine)

I saw your message on an old R2 unit we got today (well part of it at least)
You were asking for help...Obi Wan Kenobi? I wonder if you meant old Ben Kenobi, live up in Beggar's Canyon? Probably not, but is IS an uncommon name.
Anyway, I just wanted to say I think you're cute, but I can't get involved! I have work to do!!
My Uncle said I can go to Academy if I help him one more season on his moisture farm...whatever the hell that is?!!?
Maybe if things were different? Maybe if my Aunt & Uncle were dead? But they're not going anywhere...and neither am I.

Stalker/hacker - w4m

Your an Dork!! = Yes i am sexy and yes i reject your passes..but don't think i do not know who you are, i know very well. I am quietly sitting back waiting and seeing what you do. Don't think by hacking into my email and such that you have hurt/ ruined me. You never will. I find it quite funny actually. Is that you at night passing by my house? Is that you that calls me 5-6 times a day privately to hang up after hearing my voice? Reality is i don't blame you, but you must know now that you have NO chance with me. My heart belongs to someone else

Be careful. The Force is strong with that jackass. Whatever you do, don't show him your tauntauns.

HAVE THE BALLS TO SAY HI

Ok, so I read these posts, and I wonder how come no one has the guts or balls to go up to someone and say, HI , MY NAME IS SO - AND SO. Take a chance.I know this is coming off as mean, but that is not how I intend it to be. I just think that if you want something , go after it. Im not saying go up to that person and say, HI , I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU. But saying hello, never hurt anyone, and at least you wont always wonder, what if , what if... Showing confidence is very attractive and definately makes a statement. Good luck to all out there. Hope you find what you are looking for, but if you want it bad enough you reach for it. The mentality IF ITS MEANT TO BE , ITS MEANT TO BE IS BULLSHIT. You have to put yourself out there and not be afraid to be turned down. YOU STOP HAVING OPPORTUNITIES, WHEN YOU STOP TAKING CHANCES. Once again I wish everyone the best.

We've told them. They don't listen.

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Photo: flickr user fd.