The infamous lions, tigers and bears trifecta is complete in the aftermath of Hurricane Ike:
The bear was the first on the scene, arriving ahead of the storm on Friday afternoon. It made a brief, mysterious appearance on a beach in Galveston, its emergence from the crashing waves an ominous foreshadowing of the trifecta to come.
The lion appeared next, also on Galveston Island. A local exotic animal collector was holed up in a Baptist church today along with his pet lion, prompting search and resuce squads to move right the hell along to the next person who needed rescuing. Task force leader Chuck Jones put it more succinctly: "We're not going in there."
The tiger was the last to make an appearance. Authorities have reported that the animal escaped from its enclosure at an exotic animal center in Crystal Beach and is currently wandering Bolivar Peninsula. It's unclear why the tiger was left behind in the first place, but authorities are positive that it's hungry and are therefore staying away from it until animal experts arrive to secure the large cat.
With the trifecta in play, area residents are advised to keep an eye out for winged monkeys, little people with lollipops and men made of tin and/or straw.
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That bear rocks! I laughed so hard when I saw him on tv. I hope he's ok.
If I see a winged monkey (well, before the sun goes down, beings how I have no power) I am the hell outtie!!