Missed Connections

Each week Houstonist checks out Missed Connections on Craiglist. Here's a few that we found interesting.

only sex - m4w - 29 (houston)

I DONT GOT TIME FOR THESE WANNA BE WOMEN IF UR NOT FOR REAL,AND NOT A REAL WOMAN DONT MAIL ME,

Holy shit! Are you "for real?" Looks like you've been eating 'roids like Tic-Tacs. Are you sure all of your naughty bits work?

Sexplorer seeking Adventure Buddy, WF 35-45 Only! - m4w - 43 (sw Houston)

Good Day fellow adventure seeker,
I am seeking a WF or MWF 35-45 that is in search of DayTime adverntures during the week. It is to be a NsA / FwB exploration into the Sexual Unknown. If you would like to join me ion this sexcapade, please respond. Be Real, Be Local. Yah OO IM is lunchtime69. Look foward to hearing from you.

By "Sexual Unknown" do you mean an "STD of the Day" sort of a situation or something more along the lines of "Who's My Baby Daddy" sort of ting?

bored and seeking that one - m4w - 28 (tx)

Ok here I go ! I don't know if anyone actually looks at these but hey "who knows" ! first I'm a fairly attractive, in good shape, funny, great sense of humor, romantic, sensitive, cool guy. I just got out of a very intense relationship and not looking for anything serious just dinners, movies, runs at the Park?, walks at the park, sex, hanging out, watching movies eating popcorn or you ? texting till 3 am or talking, sex, going for a long drive and having the desire to stop and enjoy the scenery or whatever. I'm a pretty good lover ! I'm a great guy and friend, I look great naked, I'm white, not hung but I really know how to use it, and fingers, tongue, toes, nose, lips, legs, arms, head and what ever else we can find worthy of our enjoyment. so if you want more or less of the usual just give me a yell and we will get something going. I would love to find a friend and if I find something better great ! but not a huge deal Thanks oh yeah 3 emails then pic ! I am picky this time but you never know what my type is anyway....

You should call the dude in entry number one. He looks like he could use some help.

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Photo: flickr user fd.