Houstonist Bartender: White Russian

Dude, it's Friday. We don't know if it's the weather, the economy or what, but we're feeling Dude-like and so, today we're all about the White Russian, made the right way - not with powdered creamer. We have been league bowling for years, and we are still about the worst bowler on the planet, ever. Perhaps a few of these will improve our bowling fortunes, we may try that tactic next week. If nothing else, we'll be "entertaining" as always, or is that "dorky"?

On a different note, it's college rivalry weekend - tomorrow, our beloved 'Horns take on the much disliked Sooners (Longhorns WIN!). The Cougars tackle Tulane in the Big Easy (please bring home a "W", please -AND THANK YOU VERY MUCH, COOGS), the Aggies play K State in Kansas (this game will define the Aggies season, we think -WTF? Ag's are done like dinner, peeps) and the Red Raiders take on Big Red, the Huskers (Double T, Double Tough!). We'll be spectating some football tomorrow, maybe all snuggled up with a Russian, a White Russian. We need to use the Kahlua we HAVE to buy, every time we go to Mexico - it provides a flimsy excuse to go back, after all.

White Russian

2 oz Kahlua
1 oz Vodka
1 oz half and half, cream or milk

Grab a rocks glass, stick some ice in it and pour all of the ingredients in. Stir (take a bartending tip from The Dude, your index finger IS your stir stick) and sip. No garnish, moustachioed individuals, rake mouth over sleeve....repeat. The yummiest version uses half and half, if dieting use skim milk and suffer.

Don't overindulge, don't be a dumbass, the cab is your friend, the clink sucks, yadda, yadda...you know the drill. Houstonist does not have a bail bonds division or the funds to create one. Be safe, dammit.

History of the cocktail: We did some poking about on the interwebs (at the behest of a reader - we love having readers) and found that the White Russian allegedly first appeared in in a newspaper in November, 1965. Whilst ferreting about for intel, we stumbled on The Dudespaper - oh, how awesome. One commenter has created the "Jaundiced Russian" using egg nog instead of cream. White Russians were also the an anti-Bolshevik group from the Russian Civil War.

Given that a good portion of the world population has some difficulty digesting milk upon reaching adulthood ("lactose intolerance"), observing our Dudeist rituals can prove problematic. After all, our holy beverage — the White Russian, a.k.a. the Caucasian — is commonly made with cream, half-and-half, or milk. While this stuff surely makes the drink extra tasty (and vitamin- and protein-rich), it can also make many of us fart and feel like shit. - The Dudely Lama, from the Dudespaper.

Now, you're on your own until next Friday, we're studying the Spirituality of Bowling, in hopes that we don't totally suck at bowling this week.