Missed Connections: Thugs, Ho's and Karma Edition

Each week Houstonist checks out Missed Connections on Craiglist. Here's a few that we found interesting.

The person(s) who bulgarized my truck (Spring)

This is for the person that broke into my truck and stole my stuff (at John's Place Pub). You forgot to get the three guns from behind the seat worth about 5,000 . Also there was 10,000 cash in the lower/lower compartment under the seat. I will be happy to give this to you if you would like to meet in a secure location (i.e. No Cops). I t can just me and you or you can bring your boys. I hope you think you are a bad ass and reply to this, so I can show your little dick, punk ass what a real bad ass is. Oh, and you can come armed with the gun you stole from me too.

Only a rookie thug would leave a wad of cash and a couple-three pistols. A real badass would have taken everything, in the process of chopping the truck and burning it out. This may not end up going anywhere (beings how the thief is a punkass rookie and all), but, it is refreshing to see someone defend their property and have an interest in handing out some wild west justice. Perhaps there's a valid reason the theft wasn't reported? We don't keep that kinda green insured by the FDIC, let alone stashed in our ride.

Dancer at Legends, Marilyn Monroe Tattoo on left arm - m4w (Houston,TX)

You were working Saturday night at Legends wearing a turquoise top and we talked for a bit, then you gave me a couple dances. You have a half tattoo sleeve on your upper left arm with marilyn monroe and a shakespeare poem underneath it. Brown or black hair, very cute, beautiful smile. You said you were originally from columbia, now going to school to become a paralegal. Also worked as a miller lite model, definitely hope to see you again!

One word.....Suckah! Every dancer is a student and all the world's a stage (with a brass pole, colored lights and mirrors). "Hi, I'm Muffy! I am real smart, spell good and am only mostly nekkid for money so that I can afford to pay for a formal education." Even "technical institutes" have loan programs and financial aid, just saying.

out of order - w4m

This is so not working for me. Time to give up.

Ambiguity sucks (and is not conducive to effective MC communication). Wonder why it's not working for you?

I will do anything to make it work - m4w - 37 (Houston)

You opened it. Good Luck.....

***Karma: If there is someone you loved or still do and can't get them out of your mind, re-post this is another city.
Tonight they will remember how they love you as well.
You will get the shock of your life tomorrow***

Tonight at midnight your true love will realize they love you. Something good will happen to you at 1:00PM-4:40PM tomorrow, it could be anywhere. Tonight at midnight they will remember how much they loved you as well. You will get the shock of your life tomorrow, a good one. If you break the chain you will be cursed with relationship problems for the next 2 years. Karma. If there is someone you once loved (or still do) and can't get them out of your mind, repost this in another city within the next five minutes. It's amazing how it works!

Whomever you are missing will surprise you.
Don't break this, for tonight at midnight, your true love will realize they love you.
And...something great will happen to you tomorrow.

If you really miss someone a past love and can't seem to get them off your mind...then repost this titled as "I was wrong, I don't Hate You. I Just Miss You!"

Crackers, E-Karma'd, again. Next time, promise us cash from Bill Gates, we'll spam our whole entire contact list for some real American money. After all, Christmas is coming and we are almost in the giving spirit. Almost.

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Photo: flickr user fd.